Thursday, November 15, 2007

Bad Mother Award

OK - I win the Bad Mother Award for having a potty mouth and passing it onto my son DJ.

I did not swear in high school - at all. I did start to swear a bit in university, but it did not become a habit till I worked at a f*cking cabling company. I was the only female in a company of 45, and I was the only employee that did not actually string cable. The guys all worked very hard and they all had potty mouths! At first it offended me, but soon I fell into the habit.

I went from saying the occasional crap, to sh*t, to God-D*mning things, to using a gambit of 4-letter words, to finally, my prized expression: F*CKING HELL!

As I matured and found other career opportunities I cleaned up my act for the most part. Unfortunately, occasionally, in a highly charged situation, my prized expression still slips out.

That was OK, in most cases, but now, at home, with a 9 month old, an almost 3 year old and an almost 4 year old (PRIZED EXPRESSION, where has the time gone?) this expression is not acceptable.

I know that, PRIZED EXPRESSION, do I know that.

But a few weeks ago, my prized expression slipped out. Anderson had been throwing temper tantrums and carrying on like a fool, and due to the comotion, DJ missed the bus to afternoon kindergarten. I was upset, tired, frustrated, and I yelled out my prized expression. During our unscheduled bus chase and ultimate drive to the school yard, DJ repeated my prized expression a few times. I was so humiliated. I calmly explained to him that Mommy was wrong to use that expression and that no one should use that expression. I then made a mental note, and swore (how ironic is that action!) to never use my prized expression again.

Well, today, weeks since my prized expression was introduced into my son's ever-growing vocabulary, it reappeared.

I took all three kids to the local pool for a public swim. We had a blast! As I was buckling up the last car seat, Anderson yells out,"Ferber, Ferber is at the pool!" (side bar - Ferber is Anderson's security blanket, his well-loved, sleep-toy)

DJ, without missing a beat, and with the proper tone and anguish that any sailor or cable laying guy would be proud of, yells out," PRIZED EXPRESSION*, Anderson, you know you are not allowed to take Ferber out of the van. PRIZED EXPRESSION, Mommy, what can we do to solve this serious problem, PRIZED EXPRESSION, PRIZED EXPRESSION , PRIZED EXPRESSION???"

My almost four year old now has a nastiest and nasty potty mouths around.

PRIZED EXPRESSION, I'm ashamed of myself!

* DJ's pronunciation of my prized expression is actually "Chugging elle"


Don Mills Diva said...

You've been tagged:

Julie Pippert said...

Oh allow me to promise you yours is not the pottiest kid mouth in town.

Also---and this is just my opinion---I'd far prefer to hear d*mn (or PRIZED EXPRESSION) from a kid's mouth that some of the snottiness I hear from my kids (and others). One is just a word; the other is a sentiment.

Anyway, show me a parent who never curses at all ever in front of their kids and I'll show you someone who wouldn't want to be my friend anyway. ;)

In other words? Most of us have BTDT and won't throw a stone in a glass house LOL.

Using My Words

Andrea SK said...


Maybe it's because I'm such a potty mouth, but I can't stop cracking up at the thought of your little one spouting profanities in the car. Don't worry... Despite my bad language, I turned out okay! :)

slouching mom said...

That's really funny! As Julie wrote, it's happened to us all. No worries.

Anonymous said...

Out of the mouths of babes....(hee, hee)